Mamie and John

snips of snails and puppy dog tails

2011-09-03T14:51:00.001-07:00

Gone fishin':

Ready for retirement in Florida:

Sweet brothers:

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Piggies in a blanket

2011-09-03T14:42:00.001-07:00

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David Gray!

2011-07-05T17:55:00.001-07:00

Welcome to the coolest venue I have ever seen! It's hard to capture it in this video but it is really amazing. So here we sit, waiting for David Gray to come out following his lovely Irish folk opener, Lisa O'neill (http://www.lisaoneillmusic.com/).

YouTube Video

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Location:Akron civic theater

Love at Eight Weeks

2011-07-03T20:17:00.001-07:00

Meet Leon again, now featuring the beginnings of a personality:

YouTube Video

Tonight at dinner we talked about each of our purposes in life. The answers were fairly gospel textbook until we came to Leon, whose purpose, according to Lucy, is "to cry and poop."

We'll let you know as additional features and thus accordant purposes are added to his repertoire.

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2011-06-24T19:20:00.001-07:00

John comes home from work and whisks the big kids off to the metro parks in whatever attire they happen to be at the moment (witness Lucy, ever dress-up clad). There they tromp through the forest and throw rocks in the river to their hearts content.

Meanwhile, I relax with "little Leon", as we lovingly call him. Now six weeks old, he is perfectly amiable and a lovely evening companion.

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Location:The look of this summer

Babies in a basket

2011-06-22T18:30:00.001-07:00

On one hand, the two bigs want to act like babies.

YouTube Video

But alternately, Lucy asserts herself as a powerful bride to be.

YouTube Video

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Enjoying Saturday

2011-06-11T14:12:00.001-07:00

This morning we went to Parade the Circle at Case Western campus downtown. It was better than I could have hoped. All of the "Austin" of Cleveland was there, parading home made costumes and all kinds of art.

Now we're hanging in the backyard, christening our $5.00 slip-n-slide. John keeps showing the kids how it's done. It is a beautiful day.

YouTube Video

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Baby Leon is here!

2011-05-17T17:36:00.001-07:00

Leon Kincaid arrived last Monday night at 10:22, weighing in at a solid 9 lbs., 12 oz. At first blue and bruised from his rapid arrival, the man child is now rosy and pink cheeked, eating his weight and sweet as anything.
Thank heavens for grandma, I seriously have no idea how we'd be faring were it not for her help and presence.

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Making Good

2011-02-06T16:14:00.000-08:00

Lucy lately:

M: Lucy, what is it that makes you want to put your finger in your belly button (a favorite lil' habit)?

L: (without looking up, nor hesitation) Jesus.

On another day, after getting in trouble with dad, the two separated themselves. Finally she walks backs up and says thoughtfully, "Dad, I've been thinking. Let's play tag." And so ended the conflict.

2011-01-24T19:49:00.000-08:00

I let so many things come in the way of making a record. Somehow these photos and the quotes of the day get shoved aside in favor of cleaning or myriad other things. I regret that I don't make it a matter of more importance. Enough time goes by, the nuances of our daily life are left unrecorded, and thus not long forgotten. I will admit here something dreadful- I still have yet to make a baby book for Lucy. Rowan? Fugget-about-it. That kid is lucky to even have photos taken at all.

Why is it so easy for some, and so overwhelming for others?

Whatever the answer to that question, I am determined to at least make it manageable and consistent. I do so want this time to be preserved.

And so, a small update here:

John has been offered and accepted a position in Cleveland, Ohio- still with Boeing- but newly charged with putting business and a working team together for his own patented idea. The man knows how to get where he wants to go. We went out for a visit last week and decided Cleveland gets a bad rap undeservedly. But as native Texans ourselves, I guess we should understand that. Our house is on the market so we'll go when that's settled.

Mamie is now 6 months pregnant with baby #3 (another boy). She got her undergraduate diploma in the mail last week from BYU and is still teaching Spinning at the gym. Sleep is gradually estranging itself from her however, the honeymoon period (if you could ever actually call it that) coming to a tired and achy end. We are due May 12.

Lucy. Oh seriously, what do I even say here? The girl is constantly bursting with energy, running us to the edge of sanity and always cracking us up. Last night after we put her in bead she called out frantically, "Mom- there is something stuck in my nose!" I walked back, eyes rolling, for this type of callback is a game she loves to play. "What would you like me to do about that?"

"Can you just bring me a snow blower?"

Rowan is now just over 2 and is reveling in his new ability to communicate verbally. He talks about everything and is ever sensitive and kind. A few weeks back he came down with a flu. Walking around the house he let it go once on the newly shampooed carpet, and then again in our entryway shoe box. Each time he'd look up at me with sweet eyes and say, "Sorry mama, sorry."

In short, life is good.

It's About Time

2010-09-13T22:19:00.000-07:00

Forgive our absence. We have been busy.
Among our more interesting exploits:

We got a pet. Her name is Stella of the Hallway. I can't quite take a good photo of her digs, but we are enjoying her.

We visited friends outside of Austin who have the best pet ever. Sadie, the Duck of the Backyard. If we weren't beholden to our HOA, you better believe we'd have a duck in our yard right this instant. She is the funnest pet I've ever seen.
(Sorry, Stella)

Lucy started preschool. She is loving it.

Rowan got some "monster jams." Could he seriously be any cuter?! I die every time he has these things on.

I finished my second full triathlon in Austin over Labor Day. Also loving it.

Finally, a story from today:

Lucy (sitting in the back of the van eating smarties. Thoughtfully, she picks up the last one): "Mom, I'm going to save this one for a snowy day."
Me (smiling): "I think that's a great idea."
(10 minutes go by in transit)
Lucy: "Mom? I think I'm going to pretend it's a snowy day."

love love love that girl of mine.

iPhone Video and Pictures of the Moon, Jupiter, and it's Moons

2010-08-27T09:17:00.000-07:00

I got home late after working on my orbital Mechanics homework and couldn't resist the magnificent Moon and a mysterious bright point in the sky. A quick consultation with my astronomy app revealed that it was Jupiter. After gazing for a while, I tried to capture what I saw with the iPhone:

The First Photo of Anything I Ever took of something in the Heavens

Jupiter and it's Moons

The Moon

Mare Crisium

Mamie got the telescope for $20 at a garage sale.

I went with Lincoln to an astronomy store downtown a few months back with the intent to buy a camera to use with my telescope. Everything in the store was ridiculously expensive, so I kind of gave up on growing my astronomy habit. As it turns out, my iPhone fills the need for now.

It's amazing to see these things with your own eyes. These things are literally right above our heads, and we don't even know it until we use something that improves out vision. I certainly took the moon for granted until I saw it's detail through a telescope. Even though I have seen pictures, the physiological response of actually seeing something directly with your own eyes is visceral. Its like the difference between looking at a picture of a person and looking at that person.

I'm pretty sure that tonight (this morning) was the first time that I saw the moons of Jupiter. It was certainly the first time that I took a photo of something up there.

Branson, MO

2010-08-21T21:59:00.000-07:00

We are enjoying the best vacation this weekend in a few unlikely locations.

The first, Branson, Missouri. As much as we've seen of Missouri (and Arkansas) have been beautiful!

John and Josh at Mystic Caverns

Grandpa Bill rented a boat for the day and as you can see, Lucy couldn't have been more delighted.

She got to drive the boat,

while Rowan enjoyed the comfort and safety of my lap.

Lucy was so brave and confident on the lake, yelling for Grandpa to "go faster" and "turn in circles."

(thanks to Jessica for these boating pics)

Finally, unlikely location #2: the kids have adored this bathtub.

Miracles happen, my friends.

2010-07-13T12:15:00.001-07:00

I am bursting with excitement.

BURSTING.

But before I tell you exactly why, there is a little back story that served as inspiration for this experience.
Upon return from my mission, I went back to school and found a certain art class that I really wanted to take. And I do mean really. The only problem was that the class was full, and at this particular school you couldn't add classes with approval- you simply had to wait for an open spot electronically.
So minute after minute, day after day- I tried unsuccessfully to get in. I kept attending, and to my dismay everyone else did too. I made it a matter of urgent prayer- and somewhere inside I had a real expectation that I was going to get in.
A few days later on one of my routine calls to try again- it happened. I got in, just like that!

I was so ecstatic. But here was the real kicker: at the beginning of the next class, the instructor puzzled over the roll sheet for a few moments before he quietly murmured, "That's funny, there is one more student registered than this class is supposed to allow."

Surprised and happy, I told him my story. At this he smiled and remarked(in that thoughtful artists way), "I like miracles."

Fast forward now many years. Last week I learned that my gym needs new spin instructors. If you know me, you know I love spinning. And all of the benefits of such an opportunity are just right for us right now. So I got online to register for certification, only to find that the only training program in Texas was full, and there would not be another until the fall.
Those same feelings of determination and hope welled up and brought that old miracle to the forefront of my mind, and I decided that again I would weary the Lord with my pleadings until the very last second.
Every day I both called and checked repetitively online, each time learning that the waiting list was growing and that the chances of someone dropping out were smaller and smaller. So, a few minutes ago, for the millionth time (and close to the last)- I checked online again- this time to find to my delighted shock and amazement that a spot had indeed opened up and was now MINE.

Shrieking ensued, friends, like a little high school girl.

After securing the spot, I immediately fell onto my knees in gratitude for the reality of miracles.

There is nothing abstract in the promise that 'whatsoever thing [we] shall ask, in [Christ's name], that is good, will be given unto [us].'

Miracles are alive and well, available to us when we seek with faithful expectations of their fulfillment. I believe the Lord wants nothing more than to work in our lives in this way.

I would say that I'm sorry this post might sound preachy, but I think that would smack a bit of ingratitude. So I hope instead you will will revel with me in His mercy and love- even for such seemingly insignificant details!

Recent Events

2010-06-22T17:41:00.000-07:00

Memorial Day CapTexTri in Austin

Mom, all Morphii, and all Jr. Benacs came to support us.

Team Triple Sweat is pictured below, plus Lucy:

Richard and Traci wed in San Antonio:
Sisters and I made these (below) fun tops to coordinate with the wedding colors. We bought them resale and them cut off the bottom half, made flowers out of the fabric and then adorned each top with the others. So fun, so easy, and (I daresay) so cute.

Two sweet cousins came for a week long visit. Swimming, playing at the beach, NASA, and late night games kept us both busy and exhausted! Lucy and Rowan were in HEAVEN. We love you Hannah and Julia- come again soon!

P.S.- Lucy has taught herself how to swim. Her favorite pool game is now jumping off the diving board, and of course she insists on NO help whatsoever.

(give me a heart attack)

oh- one more thing. Jackie took this lovely picture of me with my favorite girl. I couldn't not post it:

fathers, to me

2010-06-19T20:10:00.000-07:00

No one loves like my dad does. He taught it to me as the mainstay of his belief system- the one thing that would stand if everything else was stripped away. He lives it, he exemplifies it.

His love has touched the lives of countless others, inspiring change and bringing comfort- and yet he accepts no recognition for his contributions, just lives along quietly and without assumption.

His love is one godly. And I am so grateful that for all his surface rebellion, what he is most is a disciple of Christ in its purest form:

"Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, To visit the fatherless and in their affliction, and to keep himself unspotted from the world." (James 1:27)

I honor him.

My father-in-law is full of energy. With it, he serves his family in a unique way- flying and/or driving all over the nation to attend important and also unimportant family events of various kinds. When with him, he makes you feel like you are truly the most important person in his life and that there is nowhere he'd rather be.

He relishes the details, the often mundane daily rituals, and makes them feel exciting and fresh.

He gives of himself freely- his time, his advice, his attention, his resources- as an offering of his love. His selfless service, for that is just what it is, would likely not be so considered by him. But that distinction is precisely what makes it selfless; it is to him a non-issue. It is simply who he is.

I appreciate him.

My husband loves me. When I am weak or defiant or selfish, still he shows patience and praise. His loyalty and love unfeigned strengthen our friendship and our marriage. And in his support and encouragement, I find my own capacities increased.

He is an enthusiastic and loving father, always challenging the kids in their abilities to show them how much they are actually capable of. He understands that by so doing, he helps them cultivate a strong sense of self.

His love and support buoy us up as a unit, his encouragement helps us to progress.

I cherish him.

I have naught but gratitude for these strong figures in my life, in the lives of my children The magnitude of such a blessing is not lost on me.

Memorial Day

2010-05-31T22:25:00.000-07:00

It was a great day. Mamie, Billy, and Matt competed in a relay triathalon in Austin Texas. We had a good BBQ, and I drove safely home while waxing philosophical.

Be warned, this post is more for me than anyone else. (Warning: the word "I" is used a whole bunch. Dont judge me. Me. ME. MEEEEE!!) I'm not sure where my physical journal is, so the internet denizens will be subject to my thoughts, if they have the patience or inclination to read it. This is not the distillation of my life philosophy, or the wrap up of the most important lessons I have learned, it is only an attempt to record some new and different feelings and perspective that have been forming over the past few years. Maybe this post is about growing up. Although I'm sure that in a great many ways, maybe even the most important ways, I still have not "grown up" at all.

May 2010. Memorial Day.

4.5 years since getting married.

27 years since being born.

a little over 3 years since Lucy was born and I graduated college.

2 years since moving to Houston

1 year into my masters program

9 years since graduating High School

5 years since youtube.com, and all that other world changing interenet 2.0 stuff.

40 years since the landings on the moon.

229 years since the founding out our nation.

Many thousands of years since recorded history started happening.

4 billions of years since the earth cooled from a ball of magma.

5 billion since the big ball of gas that is our sun formed and lit on nuclear fire.

15 billion years since our universe began.

Lets talk about the passage of time.

What is possible in 6 weeks? As a missionary, That was all the time in the world to find a lost soul, teach them everything they needed to know to change their lives, and do that.

In High School, that was a grading period. Another roll of the dice to see how I pushed through the obligatory hoops of a predetermined life.

As a child, 6 weeks was an eternity. It was multiple summer camps in totally new locations to do completely new things with people I had never met before.

It was multiple merit badges, campouts, books, movies, and other fantastic things.

But now, 6 weeks is nothing. It's a blink of an eye. It's a relatively small amount of time in preparation for a shuttle launch. It's an accrual of a day or so of vacation time. It's a couple of bookends in the life of my children, who in 3 years have gone from non-existant to two, and talking and walking and loving and crying and caring.

There are some things that I do at work, where I can push it 6 weeks forward or 6 weeks back, and it makes no difference at all. I can get some emails, put it on my to do list, and then do it 2 months later and it's fine.

In May 2008, Mamie and I had moved to Houston after just purchasing our second home. We had lived in our first home for 6 months and turned it from a 70s shag hole into a beautiful home in the northwest forrest. In that 6 months before we moved to Houston, I had grown incredibly tired of my job and secured a dream job working on the space station program in Houston. In the 6 months before that, we had graduated, moved, Lucy was born, and I started a job. There was a lot going on in those days.

In the 2 years since then, I have planned out multi-year strategies to replenish the air conditioning filters on the space station. I have briefed managers and shippers, set paperwork in place and handled the real time implications of tracking the long foretold serial number change-outs for those air conditioning filters by the astronauts on the space station. I have been involved in the years long saga of preparing, launching, and figuring out how to operate a 20 million dollar toilet from the Russian Space Agency.

I have sat next to the same 2 people for 2 years, and they have sat in their places for over a decade. Along with most of the other people in my group.

I have carefully planned multiyear academic pursuits and implemented them reacting and adapting to that which was not in my control, and seeing the impact in my life of having accomplished certain milestones.

A few weeks ago, I had a new badge issues to me from the Boeing company. It was without the "N" that designated me as "new." My image on the badge sports a goatee and collared shirt as opposed to the chubby gleeful "newby" in the t-shirt for my original badge.

My wife and I have worked to resolve issues that have been with us longer than the entire length of time that I was in high school.

I dont even try to find new music, or really listen to much music, as I once did. I make sporadic attempts to be current on world events, more for curiosity's sake than a fundamental desire.

We visit our families in Austin and Dallas every few months, and each time Grandma and Gramdpa, the cousins, the in laws, and ourselves are a little older. Some cousins move out of the house, some have growth spurts, Some dramatically alter their lives.

But I still am counting the toilet paper on the space station. This time for the 41st Russian "Progress" cargo spaceship to visit the station, as opposed to the 34th "Progress" ship that carried the first big delivery that I had planned out.

The return to the moon, a multi-decade program, has been cancelled. Myself and others speculate about other programs that could take a year or more to get going, and many more years to be borne to fruition, if they aren't cancelled with whoever is in charge years from now.

Life is moving fast and slow at the same time. I'm more concerned now with what I do today to make the hazy future better for my family and myself, rather than focus on how I want the future to be and shoehorn in the obligatory steps between daydreams.

I dont have too many friends, not too many that I spend a lot of time with.

I have my classes. And my church duties. And my wonderful wife. And my miraculous children. And the toilet supplies on the space station.

I dont even exercise, because a year ago my insurance denied coverage for me to get orthotics after my knees started hurting from my runs. This was after I had started a 6 month ramp-up of a regimented exercise regime that was to culminate in a marathon.

Mamie has gone from considering to training to competing in 2 triathlons in less than one year.

Our finances have fizzled through our misadventures in home ownership and landlording, and my view of wealth as it pertains to me has been reformed (or deformed) in my mind as a failed pot on a potters wheel is drenched in water and smashed into the wheel.

I finally bought a brand new mac and an iphone from the apple store. That was a big deal for me.

I spend 40 hours a week in an environment that is both changing and unchanging at the same time. The industry goes through it's convulsions, astronaut expeditions come and go, the crew size has increased to 6 on the space station from 3, and a dozen shuttle missions have amazingly been launched and flown successfully. My boss has not changed. My boss' boss was fired and replaced. His boss hasnt changed. His boss hasn't changed. His boss hasn't changed. His Boss hasn't changed. His boss did change. His Boss did not change. His bosses are the shareholders and the Board of directors, who have seen the stock go from $100 to $50 as the 787 program has gone from hotly anticipated pending launch to years and years behind scheduled delivery.

So the point of all this is about time. Whats in a year? A bunch of paychecks, a bunch of bills, regular visits to grandma and grandpa each time with bigger and brighter children. More progress toward being a great married couple. Some movies at the theatre, and more attempts to make a breakthrough at work with something grander than the toilet.

Whats in a day? Wake up with the kids (they are early risers!) Go to work and react or proact depending on what's going on. Return home to spend time playing, listening, reading, or holding the kids and wife. Maybe go somewhere after work, If I can get off early enough and if we have strength enough to pack the kids up and bring them out of the house.

Will I someday have a bunch of money to the point where I can pay for niceties that will make my family life more carefree and enjoyable? Will the infinite small steps that I do to provide for my family and myself add up or pan out to a big reward soon enough to make it all worth it?

My children. Is our mode of operation one that will yield happy, righteous, well adjusted, loving, secure, and proactive happy people? I think it is, but perhaps there is some other thing that I need to be doing. Should I throw my hand up with the extra things at work that may help me get a better job and just focus on the kids? Do I have the mental stamina to do both? Will my wife have the patience for me to do both?

I believe that God has a plan for me. I don't necessarily need to know what that plan is, and it may or may not be the plan that I think is the plan for my life (It probably isn't,) But I'm sure that God's plan will happen, so long as I let it.

Ramble, ramble, ramble.

2 years from now, My life will be totally different in some ways. In other ways, it may be exactly the same.

How much of this will be because of my choice, my inaction, my vision or my lack of imagination? How much of my life in two years will be due to the ideas and actions of my wonderful and industrious wife? How much will be because of the personality and needs of my current or future children? How much will be due to the hand of chance or the hand of God? Of market, industry, of political forces?

At this point? I don't even have the will to try to put together all the answer to the question above. Mamie and I have a good idea about how we want to be to each other, and we will work toward that. I always have ideas at work about the next big thing, And I'll keep on plugging away at something to get my above where I currently find myself. I'll keep on being the best father that I know how to, and enjoy the impossibly transient life of my incredible children as it flits by faster than I can even hope to gather it all in. Life will be how it is in 2 years.

I would not be surprised if we Benacs are in a totally different place doing totally new things.

I would also not be surprised if we Benacs were living in Houston doing pretty much the same thing (although I would probably be a little disappointed.)

Musings, Dreams, Struggle, Hope, Possibility

2010-05-26T23:23:00.000-07:00

The dreams of space.

Those dreams that I often don't let myself contemplate, for fear that it will take my attention away from the practical steps that I am focused on now that may enable me to achieve those dreams in the future.

When I am contemplative, I sit back and consider the current plans of those who struggle along side me in Man's efforts to escape Earth and what is on her.

SpaceX, Orbital, Blue Origin, Boeing, XCOR. Astronautical Engineering courses. Sweeping arcs showing Launch Vehicle Kilograms to circular orbits or escape velocity. Job postings for dynamic Loads engineer, Avionics Test Engineer, Solar Array Engineer. Rarefied Gas Dynamics, Shock Waves and dynamic pressure, nozzle expansion ratios, Melting points, rotation rates, electric discharge arc voltages, power budgets, star trackers, Nickle hydrogen batteries, redundant wiring harnesses...

This is the swarm of brushes, paints on the palate, media types, artistic methods, and implements by which Man creates the works of art that are space exploration.

These are the building blocks of the dreams of spaceflight.

In Space, Man can reinvent society. Find solitude in a nature never beheld by man, and discover alien lifeforms and landscapes. He can plunge to great depths, explode to ultimate heights, insulate himself from the deepest colds and deflect the searing heat of stars far brighter than the sun. He can blast the new knowledge that he gathers through antenna dishes across light years of space or find complete isolation from any and all who could want to communicate. He can travel at incredible speeds or swing in spiraling arcs betwixt alien moons and super-massive planets.

Finally, Man can find himself and what it is to be man when the circumstances that crowd his home of Earth have fallen away leaving him singularly alone with his consciousness and ambition.

Mankind can roll the dice again on himself, his society, and world in a billion billion different places with as many new sets of rules and society-shaping constraints.

Water Jet Operator, Turbomachinery Engineer, Planetary Scientist, Ground Control operator, Mission director, Astronaut. We are legion.

I am John Wilson Benac. I am in the midst of a structured masters degree program from the University of Southern California to learn a coherent and synergistic set of skills to enable me to shape the machines to carry man's dreams outward. I work 8 hours a day ensuring that the life support systems hardware that launches and returns from the International Space Station supports the mission requirements. I choose, along with thousands of others, the pursuit of space exploration as my careers work. And God willing, I shall move mankind outward into the void in which God placed us, to find the shores of distant lands which he created for his truly ambitions and blessed children to attain.

What paintings will be created with the pallet mankind so painstakingly prepares? The Space Shuttle, Space Station, Delta, Atlas, Proton, Soyuz, GPS, Arienne machines were once concepts alongside hundreds of other ideas which never were realized. As in the 1950s, countless tabletop designs ask for our limited resources to turn them into actual dream machines.

From Konstantin Tsiolkovsky's 1903 "The Exploration of Cosmic Space by Means of Reaction Devices" to Jules Verne's 1865 "From the Earth to the Moon" and Hermann Oberth's 1923 "The Rocket into Planetary Space," all the way through the countless college students, practicing engineers, and enchanted layman, we dream and imagine together what man may do in the limitless star filled expanse that is outer space.

Perhaps I should indulge in the pleasure and wonder by conceiving of a few paintings of my own rather than focus on the palate from which the paintings are created.

Happy Birthday baby!

2010-05-20T05:00:00.000-07:00

(early birthday lunch at Mogul Indian, thanks to all who came)

I love my man.

He is motivated to the extreme.

He believes that he can accomplish difficult tasks and as a result- accomplishes difficult tasks.

He is both an engineer and a romantic, with all of the accompanying dual positives.

He works so hard to progress, to grow, to do better whatever he sets his heart to doing.

His passions are many, mostly wrapped up into one or two.

He won't settle for less than his wildest imaginations.

I count myself lucky to be along for his ride.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I love you so.

Joy, the real thing

2010-05-19T18:37:00.000-07:00

My friend is taking a photography class.

And I'm so glad.

P.S. I want a Canon Rebel in a major way. After looking at these, who wouldn't?

This week...

2010-04-22T17:42:00.000-07:00

This week Houston is returning to semi-normal weather for the season. Still cooler than we are used to, but we are finally out back in the water for most of the day. It feels good. The kids love it. And our flowers do, too.

Gateway to the Bay

2010-04-11T18:16:00.000-07:00

coming out of the water,

("the sea was angry that day, my friends")

Katie getting her bike,

Here I go...

The grand finish yielded a major surprise:

A plaque for 2nd place in the First Timers Division.

I am HOOKED, I tell you.

The Beach

2010-04-05T12:19:00.000-07:00

Again, this trip was the best vacation ever. Total relaxation, good food, great company, beautiful environs, two birthday parties, and even a fun workout buddy.

Happy 3rd Birthday to Lucy the Lovely

Her pirate themed party included a sand castle cake

(a bit more ambitious than last years sand cake),

a treasure hunt,

and a dig for buried treasure.

Auntie Bethany's was a grand Fancy Nancy tea party, minus the tea. It turned out elaborate and fantastic, just like the auntie herself.

Love these background photos, (I think) taken by Barbara.

Favorites from the historic Civil War- Fort Morgan:

More general favorites:

Easter In Austin

2010-04-05T10:36:00.000-07:00

My family welcomed us up for Easter weekend. The weather was beautiful and cousins were plentiful. It was a perfect way to spend one of my very favorite holidays. Incidentally, it happened to fall on another very special weekend full of much needed instruction and reinvigoration. I am so grateful that Christ lives!

On to the festivities:

Easter egg hunt in Round Rock. This boy adores his daddy.

Semi-creepy Easter Bunny.

Lucy stuffed candy into her mouth as fast as she could find the next egg. Needless to say, she collected very few compared to her friends. It was so funny to watch her carefully open, unwrap, and eat each piece while the other kids whizzed around her loading up their baskets.

P.S. Beach week still to come. I am sadly somewhat iphoto illiterate. Is that embarrassing or what?

Thanks for your patience.

Oh- one other thing- THIS Saturday is my big race! So stay tuned.

Spoiled rotten.

2010-03-28T19:40:00.000-07:00

Let me just start with a mild declaration:

Me + February and March = LOVE
(the courtship kind, where you get spoiled)

Exhibit A:
Dallas Post Partum Retreat. This favorite friend and I were treated to the most relaxing weekend imaginable.

(thanks to Barbara for the love and the photo album from her lovely blog, and thanks to Jackie for the colicky baby who unknowingly drove us there)

Exhibit B:

These two favorites from my single days came to stay for the weekend and we had a real live sleepover, complete with shopping and late night junk food. Did I mention how much I adore these ladies?

Exhibit C:
Super Fun Girls Weekend-Take Two.
Beautiful (FREE) hotel room on the beach, 3D Alice in Wonderland with dear friends, late night chats, and of course the flying pictures- it couldn't quite be Super Fun without those...
(again, thanks to the Saragers)

And guess what? That's really not all. But I'll give Family Beach Week its own deserved post. In the morning.

but here's a little taste of relaxation to tide you over:

It fits today.

2010-03-04T23:03:00.000-08:00

I am too alone in the world, and yet not alone enough

to make every moment holy.

I am too tiny in this world, and not tiny enough
just to lie before you like a thing,
shrewd and secretive.
I want my own will, and I want simply to be with my will,
as it goes toward action;
and in those quiet, sometimes hardly moving times,
when something is coming near,
I want to be with those who know secret things
or else alone.
I want to be a mirror for your whole body,
and I never want to be blind, or to be too old
to hold up your heavy and swaying picture.
I want to unfold.
I don’t want to stay folded anywhere,
because where I am folded, there I am a lie.
and I want my grasp of things to be
true before you. I want to describe myself
like a painting that I looked at
closely for a long time,
like a saying that I finally understood,
like the pitcher I use every day,
like the face of my mother,
like a ship
that carried me
through the wildest storm of all.

-Rainer Maria Rilke (translated by Robert Bly)

Dear Craigslist,

2010-03-02T20:19:00.000-08:00

You came through today like a champ, like the champ.
If you had a face I could kiss you.

Love,

mamie

Observe our spoils:

2005 Dodge Grand Caravan

Gaint OCR 2 Road Bike

Clipless Pedals

You'd never believe the deals. Suffice it to say that today was our special day on all fronts. Like always, just when things seemed bleak the right options turned up.

Thank you tax refund.

Animal Cruelty

2010-02-28T18:27:00.000-08:00

Thanks to Annie for sharing this video. Something about that look in his eyes had us rolling on the floor.

Research Ever Eludes Me

2010-02-24T21:39:00.000-08:00

nem·e·sis [nem-uh-sis] Show IPA
–noun,plural-ses [-seez] Show IPA.

1. something that a person cannot conquer, achieve, etc.: The performance test proved to be my nemesis.

I am preparing for a research paper.

Bleck.

Not because I don't enjoy the process because, call me crazy, but I actually really do.

My problem? Narrowing a topic. I am hopelessly interested in an infinite number of super-complex issues. I find it torturous to extract a sliver from that mess to become my sole focus, as if I will never again participate in the process and so it must.be.the.topic.

I do this every time.

It is my recurring nemesis.

To wit:

My focus of late has centered around the societal importance of the traditional family unit. Obviously too broad. But as I break it down into pertinent subsets of my choosing, I find that my topic becomes crazy specific, like...

like too specific to even entitle.

hmm. It just occured to me (and now you have unwittingly fallen prey to my errant thoughts) that my questions beome too specific because i am thinking of it in terms of what I want to find, or maybe what I already know or think.

Hmm. I'll have to let that stew.

My point here, however, was to solicit suggestions.

"Anyone, Bueller?"

2010-02-10T19:40:00.000-08:00

My lovely friend brought me some ginger candy tonight, my favorite Taiwanese treat.

I miss it. Taiwan, that is.

Some nights I lay awake trying to remember how to get to a certain market from my one of my apartments, or a certain friend's home, a train station, a familiar park, Xi Wang Ai school, or my favorite little roadside restaurant (the one that was all Vegetarian). I try to remember the smells and tastes and most of all to remember peoples names. (groan)

I wonder what my friends are doing now- and who I'd see if I were to suddenly drop in at church.

Life has changed so much for me since then- and yet so much of the meat of me was made by sweating and wasting and wearing myself out there.

It seems so far away sometimes. I want desperately to keep it from becoming something of a dream.

And so I try to imagine it the way it was. And myself the way I was.

...in detail...

Perhaps one day I'll make it back. Yes, let's consider that a promise.

I hope that when I do my friends won't find me too much changed.

John's Feel for Obama's 2011 NASA Budget

2010-02-02T17:54:00.000-08:00

On Obama's change in NASA's direction:

First let me say that I am genuinely concerned for my buddies working the Constellation program. I pray for them that their families and their careers may be provided for. I'm really glad that Obama asks for $2.5 Billion in Constellation closeout costs, because I hope that that keeps paying for my friend's kid's baby food. I have already felt the same way for my friend's valiantly supporting the shuttle throughout it's glorious ULF5(7?) end. It's like knowingly marching towards a cliff because you believe in what you are doing.

Secondly, I must say that policy wise, I like Obama's 2011. Here is why:

With regard to the constellation program, here is what is wrong with it, which feelings I have held long before Monday's Moon shattering revalations:

The Orion crew size recently dropped to 4 from 6. 4 is a very small number. Thats 1 more than the 40 year old Russian Soyuz. Thats 2 less than the space stations current crew compliment. Thats less than the fingers that I have on one hand. Its. too. small.

After George Bush axed the ISS lifeboat, Centrifuge Accomodation Module, and habitation module, Mr Bush got us all spun up about the Constellation thing: (Blast you for fueling our dreams with speeches and not cash!)

"Our second goal is to develop and test a new spacecraft, the Crew Exploration Vehicle, by 2008, and to conduct the first manned mission no later than 2014."

CEV has not been funded and is not on track to meet those deadlines. Also, Ares 1, the rocket to take it to space, wouldn't be ready by then anyway. And a crew of 4!!!

"Our third goal is to return to the moon by 2020, as the launching point for missions beyond. Beginning no later than 2008, we will send a series of robotic missions to the lunar surface to research and prepare for future human exploration. Using the Crew Exploration Vehicle, we will undertake extended human missions to the moon as early as 2015, with the goal of living and working there for increasingly extended periods. Eugene Cernan, who is with us today -- the last man to set foot on the lunar surface -- said this as he left: "We leave as we came, and God willing as we shall return, with peace and hope for all mankind." America will make those words come true. (Applause.)"

Roboti-who? Twenty Fift-when!?! Please folks, hold your applause, really.

"NASA's current five-year budget is $86 billion. Most of the funding we need for the new endeavors will come from reallocating $11 billion within that budget. We need some new resources, however. I will call upon Congress to increase NASA's budget by roughly a billion dollars, spread out over the next five years. This increase, along with refocusing of our space agency, is a solid beginning to meet the challenges and the goals we set today. It's only a beginning. Future funding decisions will be guided by the progress we make in achieving our goals."

Two words. Not. True.

If that wasn't enough, NASA picked reliable low performance non space regenerative hypergolic fuel for the thrusters of the Orion capsule, rather than methane, which was in the original planes, which can be harvested from Mars, volatile rich regions of the lunar poles, or anywhere else in the solar system where there is ice. Or an ECLSS by-product. Lame disappointment.

Ares 1 was really behind schedule.

The Lunar Lander contract was not funded. Ares 5 was not funded. And it was January 2010. Come on! The RFI for the Altair Conceptual Design Contract came out a long time ago!

Europe, Russia, Japan, and China were completely out of the Constellation picture. That's not cool. And that's not economically viable. And international partnerships are probably the deciding factor for why the space station has survived to maturity.

Those were probably my biggest misgivings about the current program. When you read the awesome fanfare and plans with which the program was announced, it's easy to see why so many people love it, but the Constellation program, as pointed out by our Augustine graybeards, wasn't living up to the hype, and needed even more cash than Obama is giving the agency to get going.

With regard to the new program, It really is pouring in a lot of money into developing new capabilities. Whatever Obama's 8 year successor dreams up (moon, mars?), he will have a beefier toolbox to make his plans with. If Obama gets a advanced interplanetary propulsion (VASIMIR) and a matured heavy launcher and multiple commercial providers for crew to Low Earth Orbit by the end of his presidency... that would be so enabling-ly awesome.

Any multi-billionare person or government could throw some seriously cool hardware to all of the places in the inner solar system that they wanted to go. So long as that person was buddy with the US government and Obama follows through with that export control reform.

The program of record would not do that.

So I'm excited about the new direction.

And by the way, for the first time since George Bush Senior, NASA's budget will see year over year increase. Clinton reduced the budget 7 out of his 8 years. George W funded NASA at lower levels than he himself established in the VSE in 2005. It's like getting a mortgage on your house that costs $2000 a month because your boss says that you are getting a raise, and then he doesn't give it to you, so you are stuck with your income of $1900. What happens to a space program in that situation? Crappy design. Behind schedule. COMPROMISE!

Rock on Obama's 2011 NASA Budget! May you live forever (Or at least through the Congressional process, which is run by a bunch of vote hungry short sighted sensationalists!)

I am more excited about a career with opportunity for lots of cool developmental projects in 2020 using cutting edge technology than to find myself trying to pick up the pieces of all those NASA folks who are retiring as they leave me with a program that still hasn't landed on the moon, is under capability, and hasn't broken any new ground beside the schedule.

Now, go! Tell your representatives what you think! Email, Fax, Call, and Visit your Congressmen to tell them to say "Heck yes," to the NASA part of Obama's 2011 budget. Don't let the crazies get in it's way!

Here's to a Challenge

2010-01-27T19:24:00.000-08:00

I just signed up for my first triathlon.

It's exciting, but I think I mentioned before that I really dislike competition.
And I'm not sure why, but somehow preparing to do it alone eases that apprehension to a small degree.

So, stay tuned as I gear up. For real this time, not just the dry run that was Fall/Winter. Although to be fair, said dry run did relieve me of 20 (yes 20) unwanted pounds. So that's something.

TTFN

Life is good even despite this crappy, crappy day.

2010-01-19T19:38:00.000-08:00

Have I mentioned lately how much I love this girl?

Or this angel boy?

He may not be ready to walk yet, but he makes up for that in his fearless and daring climbing and sliding endeavors. What a little man. (that slide is pretty high, btw)

In the end, I have only cause to give thanks. And indeed, I do.

2010-01-10T21:43:00.001-08:00

Getting Set up with ping.fm

Wouldn't it be nice

2010-01-10T21:34:00.001-08:00

I have some seriously talented friends. And sometimes it's all I can do to not let it overwhelm me. Like a mantra, I have to remind myself that I don't have to do everything I see that I love.

But secretly I still want to.

And maybe I really can if I want to.

Dear Time,

Please give me a little break so that I can accomplish the following (both simultaneously and without interruption):

1. learn to make a quilt (and do it.)
2. finish my book purses
3. train for my triathlon
4. learn to take better photos
5. embellish my living room curtains
6. paint my walls

...wait, maybe it is actually "money" to whom I should address this letter.

In any case, let's just consider this a little list for the year (don't want to be too ambitious).

Bring it on 2010.

Au Revoir 2009

2009-12-31T18:15:00.000-08:00

We are finally home from the holidays.
It's nighttime, the kids are in bed.
It feels so good to hear Lucy calling out incessantly from behind her own door rather than someone else's.
The burdensome question,"Are we bothering anyone?" is finally laid to rest for another few months.

sidenote: From the living room John just coughed. Immediately Lucy cried out, "Daddy? Are you there? Daddy are you ok?"
And currently she is wailing the incoherent, "Daddy I said yes, you may."

Yes, I am glad to be home at last.

We loved our travels, we are grateful to our hosts and family for loving us back.

In chronological order:

Kemah Boardwalk family night

Dallas Pre-Christmas trip

Home for Christmas day

Austin Post-Christmas Revels

"MUD!"

and cousins,

Merry Christmas

2009-12-10T18:36:00.000-08:00

This year we're not sending cards. Want to know why? Well for starters, Johnnie boy finally got himself an iphone. Any of you who know him even superficially will know that he has long coveted this piece of technology. He held himself back for so long, for which restraint I offer sincere congratulations. It was no small task for my apple lover.
So what does that have to do with Christmas cards?
Well, it gives me a convenient excuse: we simply can't afford such another luxury right now.

And so, our year in esummary:

John.

is on his way to the moon;
he is tearing through his masters degree while still working 40+ hours for mother Boeing. He continues to surprise us with his stamina and working knowledge of EVERYTHING space related. He works long and hard, never losing sight of his ultimate life goals. Also, he promises that the iphone will make all of our wildest dreams come true.

Mamie.

is addicted to exercising;
ran her first race this year and looks ahead to a triathlon and possibly a half marathon early next year. She has developed the crafter within this last year, repurposing and papering anything that stands in her path. She has a strong and close network of friends that keep her both sane and inspired, a gift that she does not look on lightly. She loves being mother to two precocious and intensely adorable babes.

Lucy.

is her own little woman;
says to Mamie,"No mom, that's not a good idea," and "I love you" more than any other two phrases. She remembers names to every face, and makes those around her feel so special when they hear it through her little mouth. She is a friend to everyone she ever meets. And when she enters a room, she confidently announces her arrival with the full expectation that those within were just sitting around waiting for her for life to begin. She is a breath of LIFE, of color vivid and strong, of passionate love and a keen spirit. She is our fire.

Rowan.

is why we will keep having children;
his big blue eyes and easy smile make it impossible to ever feel angry with him. He laughs at music and feathers and Lucy and trees- it is remarkably refreshing to spend time with such an one. In contrast to Lucy's fiery intensity, he generates a calming, almost jubilant feeling wherever he goes. While rarely cranky, he is increasingly opinionated. Watching him exert his opinions in the face of a sometimes bossy older sister is loud but also hilarious. He is kind, but not to be trifled with. He is our gem, rare and precious.

We have learned some really important lessons this last year, all pointing us in the same direction. Each of our experiences has reminded us that Christ lives, prayer works, and the family unit has been given to us to teach us in a more tangible way the love that God has for us (his children) and how we should show our love for him in return.
We are grateful beyond words for the support of our families this last year. Moreover, we are grateful to our Savior Jesus Christ for His birth, life teachings and ultimate sacrifice so that we losers can have a chance to live and learn.
I love him. And I am so grateful.

Finally, we love all of you. We hope your year has been prosperous and happy and that the best things will come to you in 2010.

Repossessed

2009-12-10T14:24:00.000-08:00

Before:

After:

Rejuvenating old pieces like this is one of my favorite things. Not bad, eh?

Understanding

2009-11-30T20:07:00.000-08:00

After a slight disagreement about what to do with the grocery bags after putting away the groceries, Mamie came up to me and said:

"I love you.

I know that sometimes I might seem overly critical, but really, it's just that you do so many things wrong."

Then we laughed.

2009-11-30T07:06:00.000-08:00

It was last night when I finally allowed myself to recognize that the holiday was over.

It's interesting that a week can last forever when it's bare of family and festivities, but when surrounded by cousins and leisure time and the most delicious sinful foods, it ends in an instant.

We had fun.

And I ran my race within my goal time, with even 4 seconds to spare. I owe my success to my SIL who assumed the thankless job of encourager for the last two miles. She even laughed when I told her to shut up. That is love.

photos to come when I can do it.

Are you still there?

2009-11-18T21:01:00.000-08:00

I've been neglecting our blog again. Not that too many people out there particularly care, which is actually a really good thing because I don't think I could take that kind of pressure from the nebulous blogosphere. My SIL, for example, goes offline for a few months and seriously gets hate mail. Apparently she owes it to the world to say something witty every few days.
That's why it's all baby photos and long-winded space dialogue around here. We're only looking for a bare click-in, click-out following.

But we're so glad you still stick around. That's true love.

News:
1. I signed up today for the 8 mile Dallas Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving morning. This will be my first race since I began triathlon training.
...hmm. That might be a little unclear. This will be my first race, ever.
I'm not much for competition, so I got nervous just registering.
But I know it's time.
so yee-haw. I'll let you know how it goes. Or if I don't, feel free to draw your own conclusions.

2. We are so ready for the holidays. It has actually been cool enough for a few days that we've been able to pull out LONG SLEEVED attire. Sweet Lucy insisted on wearing her uggs, gloves and a hat to the gym this morning. A bit excessive for the 60 degree weather, but I seriously pick my battles carefully with that free spirit.
Here is the cutest decoration I have so far (courtesy Sherrard Photography. Thanks a mill, Christa):

Cutest caterpillar to butterfly duo I've ever seen.

2009-11-03T13:15:00.000-08:00

We were so lucky to have some cousins visiting. I love living so close to so much family.
Oh my goodness they were so adorable.

Impressions of Huntsville, Alabama

2009-10-25T00:26:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting in front of a rusty gate closed by a chain and padlock. Birds are chirping behind me and I hear crickets in the woods on both sides. I feel a peaceful serenity and solitude at the end of this torn up road. In the distance in front of me, beyond the gate and a row of low trees rise two towers of steel webbed girders, adorned with propellant and oxidizer tanks and cranes that look as if they have been caught in a spider's web waiting to be consumed and sucked dry. I can not see the base of the towers; they are obstructed by different kinds of trees. A low pitched whirr is coming from the base of the towers, perhaps some sort of refrigeration system? A wren calls out. The road that I am on, at the southern end of Redstone Arsenal and the Marshal Spaceflight center, is cracked and the asphalt litters the road in spots with pebbles. A wasp just performed a flyby of my computer screen. Perhaps he wonders why someone has come here to sit on the hood of his car and type into his computer. The wildlife gets louder. Perhaps they are more comfortable now that I have been here for a while. I wonder how the wildlife reacted when the mammoth F-1 engines were tested at this test stand in the 1960s.
This morning, my manager told me that the engineers had not considered the magnitude of the acoustic shock from the engine, and with no suppressing countermeasures, windows for miles around were broken out by the shockwave. That was the first time the engineers working on that engine had operated something so powerful. Perhaps only weaker than the atom bomb, but the F-1 engines sustained continuous explosion, while a nuclear bomb is over in an instantaneous flash.

I hear a clang. The whirring stops. When the airplane overhead moves on, I expect to hear no man made sounds at all. Only the birds and crickets inhabit this place, along with the inanimate man made objects.

Two walkers approach me from behind, and give me a nod. They reach the gate, turn around, and return back down the winding wooded avenue.

30 minutes ago I stood in front of the Jupiter C, Redstone, Saturn 1, Hermes, and V2 rockets lined up in a row about a mile north of where I sit. The Jupiter was riveted together, like a vintage airplane with round rivets that protruded from the metal, unlike modern airplanes where the rivets are flush. It looked like something that was put together a long time ago. These rockets weren’t that big, either. I looked up at the Redstone rocket, which carried Allan Sheppard into his suborbital flight so long ago. I could be on top of that, I thought. It's not even that tall. I did a full walk around the Jupiter C. The V2 Stood next to the Hermes. It's comical bulbous pointy shape pointed to the sky. "I aim for the stars" was the name of the movie made about Von Braun. "But sometimes I hit London," a satirist suggested as an addendum to the title. That V2. Here in Alabama. Far from Penuumbre where it was conceived and manufactured. It came to these woods in Alabama with the designers to show the hunters how to begin the ascendance above the atmosphere. This same machine above me at the time served as a beacon along the trail to the stars, whereas if it had been picked before one of the other V2 rockets in the final days of World War Two at Penuumbre it could have been one of the rockets that killed 168 people at Woolworths in New Cross, London. Its brother V2, which actually struck Woolworths, could be the one standing erect at the Redstone arsenal in 2009. Would it feel survivor’s guilt like the Apollo moon walker Eugene Cernan felt guilt for not being shot at in fighter planes over Vietnam because her was flying in space missions to the moon?

The V2 rocket and Von Braun both came here to Alabama to shake their dark past of fatal slave labor from Jews and merciless arbitrary killing against the people of London. They came to Alabama, with no pretentions about their past, but a dogged determination to make good with the evil gift that had been a mainstay of Nazi desperation in the waning days of World War Two. Still, here at the Redstone armory, both Von Braun and V2 were saddled side by side with the development of the nuclear-carrying ICBM missiles. Hitler had pushed rockets for war in the 1940s, and in the 1960s, Von Braun was not free from the clutches of a country that used every advance in space exploration to further the military technology of missiles.

I pondered on the simple calculations that I had done the night before as I took my propulsion midterm exam. Those formulas that I employed to answer the arbitrary questions, did the engineers who built this hardware really know them much better than I did when they were grappling with the Redstone rocket design? I saw the smooth tubular shell of the rockets. "How complicated is it in there?" I wondered. As I looked carefully, I saw a bird pecking about inside the rocket inside the mesh. That bird was more familiar with the inner workings of the rocket than I was. When I draw my sketches on paper for a homework problem, they are so simple. I know that there are mysteries that the engineers had to discover and uncover as they built these rockets. The unseen intricacies underneath the white painted skin are what has become ingrained in these Alabama hunters. It's that mystery that has been frozen into these steel webbed towers that rise before me. They wait for us to build again.

I hear a rocket firing to my left. It is still going. Is it an engine? It sounds throttled back. The birds complain, breaking out into shrieks. I still hear the sound. It sounds like metal being dragged across the floor. It sounds like a waterfall.

The rocket is throttled up again. It sounds like sparks flying. It sounds like standing under a shower head, echoed through the hilly wooded countryside. I can’t imagine anything other than a rocket test that could make that noise. Now I hear crows in front of me beyond the trees beginning to caw. Perhaps they have had enough. Or maybe they are going to go and see what I can only imagine as I sit here.

These test stands wait here. They stand ready for America to build new engines, to try new technologies never before built by man. These towers are sleeping giants ready to roar to life with the birth of the engineering artifacts that will carry other men’s dreams, other men’s fears, and other men’s pride forward and upward through the atmosphere to unknown worlds and lands..

Men like Von Braun, who walked this very road countless times from the time that the government brought him here to this army base in 1960 with a mandate to put America on the Moon. Some of the Alabama country folk stopped hunting deer in the forests to start building rockets. They never stopped hunting deer, they just moved to other forests. One of the first things that I heard here in Alabama was when I got my security clearance at the Arsenal entrance: A group of locals were standing outside the security post and one said: “When I was gutting a deer this weekend…” in a deep southern drawl. I smiled as I headed to the rental car. These Alabamans didn’t put down their guns when they picked up their tools to construct this oddity in the universe; this portal to change. Where hunters ascend to Knowers. Doers. Makers. Be-ers.

I sit here, surrounded by birds, the very creatures that moved Wilbur and Orville off the sands of the beach in Kitty Hawk. An airplane flies above me now, a creature of man’s making that further moved men to build spaceships and rockets. I sit in front of the towers with their mechanical whirr (it started up again). The towers are creatures that are moving me to some future transcendence. What is it? I can envision interplanetary voyages, as the Wright brothers and Da Vinci envisioned flight when seeing the birds; as Goddard, Oberth, and Braunn envisioned space travel after seeing the airplanes. I see the current day spaceships, the test stands before me right now... I envision permanent settlement on the Moon and Mars. I envision simplified reliable rockets bringing up satellites, experiments, people, and energy into space. I envision a people who identify themselves not with their country, but with their planet and solar system. I envision knowledge spread among the people.

The walkers return again. The same walkers, dressed in sweatshirts and jeans. How many times do they make this trip? I asked them what the noise was earlier. They didn’t even notice. They told me, in their Alabama accents, about how different parts of the arsenal were used to test army missiles and NASA motors. They didn’t notice the sounds. It is such a regular occurrence to them that it only enters their subconsciousness. Those sounds are as natural to them as the birds and crickets.

I set the laptop down and walk down a small street that comes off the dead end where I sit toward the sound that I heard earlier. Perhaps I will catch a glimpse of the source of the noise. Writing on the back of a receipt that I find in my pocket, I make note of these things: The street is covered with dead tree bits. I pass a white blockhouse with a silent diesel generator installed on the side. The blockhouse can’t be larger than 15 feet by 8 feet. Next to it stands a rusty radio tower, consumed with vines. The old-school antennas atop the tower point toward the source of the sound. In big blue letters 4692 is written on the side of the building. A little further down the road, I meet another rusted gate, this one marked with a small white sign with C-12 painted on it, the paint mostly washed away by years, rain and sun. The padlock is rusted, the barbed wire atop the gate is rusted. An old metal mailbox bolted to the gate has been bent to the point that it no longer closes. I see through the open top that the bottom has been rusted out. What type of letters were delivered here, next to the sign that reads "DANGER: Explosives Keep Away." Perhaps the neighbors dropped off letters asking the workers to keep down the noise. Perhaps the wives of the engineers dropped off lunch in the little box? The gate itself has had vines growing from one side all the way to the other, only to die years ago. The dead vines now cross through the gate, past the padlock, as if to confirm the prohibition of access and the permanency of closure. The road continues past the gate in a straight line, ending in trees far away. Dead branches from the encroaching forest lay in the path, not even causing enough of a nuisance to warrant removal.

When I return to the car, a different walker passes by. He wears mesh shorts and is listening to headphones. He walks decidedly to the gate and taps the little white "C-18" sign as a token of reaching the end of his lap. And this is the end of my lap.

This is Huntsville. This is the Redstone Arsenal. This is the Marshal Spaceflight Center.

For me it is, anyway.

As I ready to leave, I hear once again the sound of rushing water, sparks, a metal plate being drug along the ground, or whatever it is.

I guess this place isn’t sleeping after all.

A Baby to Keep Families in Business

2009-10-21T12:29:00.000-07:00

A sweeter baby there never was. I have spent the last year adoring every movement of this sweet cherub of a boy. And now a full year has already come and gone. I admit I am loathe to let him grow from this state. He has been a delight in every sense and I can scarce imagine my life/our life without his serene and unapologetic happiness- Happy Birthday to my sweet Rowan.

Beautiful. Unspoiled. Exotic. Mars.

2009-10-15T20:59:00.001-07:00

Check it

Daddy's Meetings

2009-10-13T12:22:00.000-07:00

This morning we drove past John's building while we were out.
Lucy: Can we pick up daddy?
Me: No sweetie. Daddy is in a meeting.
L: No, he's not in a meeting. He's at work.
M: You're right. Did you know that sometimes daddy has meetings when he's at work?

L: About spaceships?

M: ...Yes actually,I guess they are.

Lovely Romneys

2009-08-30T18:14:00.000-07:00

Brad, Carli, and kitties came for the weekend.
Our camera, however, did not join in the fun.
Among the festivities:
- Feast fit for kings
- Hardcore spinning workout for the ladies
- Galveston boat tour. Lucy successfully called the dolphins just the way her Nana taught her
- BBQ with the Strattons and the elusive Lindsay Bertrand Mulholland

wah. I miss them already.

Girls Weekend in Austin

2009-08-30T17:42:00.000-07:00

A few friends and I hopped in the car last week for a weekend in Austin to see Wicked and (for me) to see my sweet beautiful niece off to college. *sniff*sniff*
Here we are at the show:

My lovely Zoe, may she remain single for a few years to come:

My sweet Jackie:

Wonderful Kate:

Adorable Clarissa:

and my Darling Angel sister Melisa:

where to begin?

2009-08-07T05:57:00.000-07:00

I went to Seattle this week to get our house ready to sell. Our renters did a spiteful job moving out, so when I got there the task (especially in just 2 days)was seriously overwhelming.

But Wait! Do not despair for long. A quick and earnest call to The Man Upstairs yielded miracle after miracle. With help I was able to accomplish all of my goals with the house and although I haven't yet checked for myself, it should be listed on MLS this morning.
A quick list of some of the major jobs:
-garage door replaced
-front door replaced (renters kindly broke out 5 panes of glass on the old one)
-carpets AMAZINGLY cleaned
-new paint and touch up throughout the house
-garbage and other random trash removed (I LOVE Craigslist.)
-huge ugly privacy trees felled in front
-screen repairs
-mean deep clean of every corner
-hooked up with a great and super- competent agent

Miracles, I tell you. Miracles.

This is Kathy in the middle. She was my project manager. Without her I coudn't have accomplished much. Becky (on the right)is our agent. She and her husband are also amazing.

To say thank you feels so very inadequate. It was nothing short of miraculous. I am so grateful to all who came out of the woodwork to make this a success story better than anything you've seen on HGTV.

this makes me laugh out loud

2009-07-30T05:21:00.000-07:00

A few random things

2009-07-21T12:57:00.001-07:00

Funny Lucy says:

"Be careful mom, there is disgusting in there."

"No. Jesus wants to help me, NOT you."

In other news-

Last night John backed out of NASA Astros night for his math homework- so I got to take a girlfriend to the game sans kiddos. It was ridiculously enjoyable. Plus we had the rare opportunity to sit smugly as, one by one, each of our friends surrounding us left to take tired babies home.

Inning 6, 7, 8, 9 we cheered and ate ballpark food like two regular self-serving adults.
Attractive, I know. But actually, is it really regular for anyone to eat a footlong hotdog? I didn't finish it, for those of you concerned.

Beautiful girls.
It was SO much fun. And I don't capitalize that lightly.

Two sinks are better than one.

2009-07-19T22:06:00.000-07:00

Here's why:

Awesome Day

2009-07-17T20:08:00.000-07:00

Today was pretty awesome.

At 9:15, I went to the 5th floor of my building for a presentation by the crew of the Hubble Space Telescope Space Shuttle mission. People were shy, so the seat right in from of the 7 astronauts was wide open. I sat as they thanked the Boeing company for what we do, and watched a video presentation that Greg Johnson, the pilot, had created about the mission. None of the other astronauts had seen it yet, either, except for Greg.

The video was amazing. They did a bazillion spacewalks and swapped out the fridge sized telescope instruments that analyzed the stars in different ways. They put on new thermal insulation, then ripped off a handrail that was in the way of getting at the instruments, they swapped out the gyroscopes that let the Hubble point at stars when it is focused way in, and they did open heart surgery on some of the computers, removing dozens of screws at a time, pulling out circuit cards, and putting in new ones.

The most amazing part of the presentation was not the video, but something that all of the crew members did during the video, and I was front row to see it:

Scott Altman, the commander, was explaining how after they had completed their work on Hubble, they released it from the robotic arm. After that, he said something like: "I gave 10 short bursts on the thrusters after we released the Hubble. Even though we weren't moving and it was, it seemed to pass right over us. Because it was so large, it was an imposing sight." Now, that doesn't sound so impressive as the other things that they did, but as the crew watched that part of the video (on the monitor behind me and in front of them) as it showed the massive, amazing Hubble pass over the top of the orbiter.

As I looked at the faces of the crew, all of their eyes were wide. They remembered the awesomeness of that moment, and I had a front row seat to the first time that they had seen it on film since being there. One bit her lip. They all sat almost taut as they relived that moment, and I had a candid peek into an unplanned non-verbal communication from the crew: They were awestruck, even though we in the crowd were less affected. How could we have been? We were sitting on our duffs watching a video. They were remembering the experience that they had lived.

So, astronauts think that their job is cool. It's not like they practice it so much that it becomes rote. It is even more amazing to them than it is to all us fanboys because they actually know how awesome it is in a way that words, movies, press conferences, and pictures will never convey.

After the presentation, I asked Scott about the rescue mission that would have happened if their shuttle had been damaged from falling foam. He told me that they had two boxes of power bars that they could have survived on for almost a month while they waited for the rescue shuttle to arrive. They would all have to suit up and climb along a rope strung between the two orbiters, and he didn't have a space suit his size on his shuttle; the rescuers would have to bring one for him.

They finished the questions and I asked Drew Fuestel about the merits of a Masters vs a PhD program in Planetary Science. He said that Masters degrees were the baseline, and people with PhDs were differentiated. I asked him because he is a geophysicist, which is what I want to study at CalTech come 2011 and the completion of my USC masters program in astronautical engineering.

I left that event and drove to the mission control building, where Duane Ross, head of Astronaut selection and training, was speaking to a pretty small group of mission control employed astronaut wannabes about the selection and training of the astronaut class of 2005. That was cool. This was the guy who picks and trains the astronauts. One of the people that was in that astronaut class was Jose Hernandez. The reason that I recognized him in the pictures of his field geology and survival training pictures is because yesterday, when I was in Building 4 giving some presentations to my boss's boss's NASA counterpart, I was waiting for the elevator next to this man. Someone walked by and congratulated him on the successful launch of the shuttle on Wednesday, because that meant that he was going to go up soon. I figured that he must be an astronaut as we rode up the elevator together. (I told him that I was going to the 4th floor, and he was kind enough to push the button for me.) That night, I looked him up, and he has a pretty amazing story. So it was cool to come full circle so fast and hear about his selection and training a day later. I asked Duane Ross a couple of questions, as well, like: "Is it more important to develop specialty skills, like experience with hydrology, or get familiar with the more standard things that everyone has to be familiar with, like getting scuba certified?" He said that there were 14 people on the selection board and that there were 14 opinions. That very type of question was asked, he said, and there was no consensus. He said that the overriding factor was the answer to the following question: Would I want to fly a mission with this guy?

When his presentation was over, I went up to him and discussed the education thing a little bit more, and then went back to the Boeing building. When I got back to my desk, Drew Fuestel was in the row of cubicles right next to mine. He was at my desk in a few minutes and I had the Boeing photographer, who was following him around, take a picture of us with the massive-lensed camera she was carrying around. That should be a good-looking picture. (All of the astronauts were in their blue flight suits, which is cool.)

So he left and I got back to work. My job rocks.

Needless to say, after writing this post, I feel a little bit more motivated to slog through the math class that I am doing for USC tonight. 3 credits in 6 weeks. Ouch.

2009-07-16T07:56:00.000-07:00

I took the kids to Dallas for a few days. A few friends were heading up to meet their men for a work conference, so I hitched a ride to see some of the Benacs.
We had a great time.We hit up Chuy's for some yummy Tex-Mex, the midnight opening of Harry Potter, and of course I took the girls to my favorite spot, The Dallas World Aquarium.

Lucy always loves the shark tunnel best.

She and Liz in awe at the general sharky splendor:

Finally, mere minutes before we were to leave, the kiddos just couldn't stay out of the water.

Thank you Nana and Grandpa for such a wonderful little visit!

Happy Sunday

2009-07-12T08:13:00.000-07:00

Happy Sunday from this boy and the rest of us.

Auntie Befamy

2009-07-04T20:18:00.001-07:00

This one's for you. Thanks for being such a sweet Auntie.

Catch Up

2009-07-04T19:40:00.000-07:00

busy again. and lazy.
Or rather, computer lazy.
I just don't have it in me lately to be online.

Here's what we've really been up to:

First things first. Today we had so much fun celebrating the 4th together. These are from our parade and the park romp that followed.
Apparently the sirens were a bit too loud for some onlookers.

Lots o' swimming. (In case you haven't heard , Houston is hot)

Lucy with her faves at a play

Our friends did so well

And finally, a much needed date

Conversations with Lucy

2009-06-05T08:00:00.000-07:00

I have thought so many times that I should record some of my bedtime talks with Lucy. It is such a funny time- we lie in her bed while she recounts her day, asks about friends and family members (last night she wanted to know what Auntie Befamy was doing) and she loves to sing.

So here is one from a few nights back. The lights are off, so no picture.

2009-06-03T19:02:00.000-07:00

2009-06-03T18:59:00.000-07:00

The duality of joy

2009-06-03T18:37:00.000-07:00

I have a love/hate relationship with my role as a mother. In fact, I'm starting to believe that in order to be a really good one, it's kind of necessary to hate it sometimes. (yeah sure, hate might be a strong word. whatever helps you sleep at night.)

What do I mean? Allow this illustration.

While on my Mother's Day vacation I was free. Unemcumbered, alone with merely the whining/tantrum throwing voices in my own head, carrying a small purse rather than a house-sized diaper bag. It was so refreshing.

We stopped at the store late that night for some goodies, and as we walked through the parking lot I noticed a frazzled looking mother sitting in her car with the windows down. A toddler sat screaming his little head off in the backseat- and I recognized too well the look on her face.

My sister and I exchanged a knowing glance, and in that same moment I suddenly missed my own little toddler fiercely.

Something funny in its coming- how ofttimes the highs are most poignantly recognized in the very face of the lows. Indeed, I wouldn't trade my screaming toddler for all of the solitude in the world.

2009-05-30T18:35:00.000-07:00

We've been busy lately. Lots of playdates, one surprise party, one girls night out, one guys night out, and finally- a sweet family day at the Children's Museum in Houston.
Whew, we really have a lot to be grateful for.

Sadly, the camera is currently MIA. Any of you who know us well will not find that the least bit surprising.

Here is the one photo that did make it:

We love our friends. Thanks for coming to take the monotony out of these hot mornings, everyone.

Lucy has something to say...

2009-05-25T18:38:00.000-07:00

...to her very favorite almost-Auntie.

Happy Birthday, Clarissa. We love you!

Birthday Boy

2009-05-20T21:06:00.000-07:00

Happy birthday to John today. My reasons for loving him are, of course, innumerable, but were I to enumerate a few I would have to start with these (note: If you aren't into touchy-feely, go on and skip to the photos):

1. He makes me laugh. I love his melodramatic and quirky sense of humor- the way other people don't get it, the way it sneaks up on me out of the blue. I loved that from the moment we met.

2. He is one driven son-of-a-gun. Never willing to settle for mediocrity, he pursues his real and true dreams. Who would have thought that two years out of college we would be living in Houston where he works for NASA? Not me, my friends. But I guess every day more and more I have to concede the point that in life, we really can do and be what we want. That has been a very valuable lesson to me.

3. He is passionate about things that he loves. Another favorite characteristic from the beginning has been John's big heart. He loves deeply and with loyalty. He learns and studies and researches until he really knows a principle to completion. It is a rare and priceless quality, I have found. So many of us lack the dedication to take our learning to that point.

4. He is a great father. I love watching him teach Lucy or hold Rowan. He adores those children; it is apparent in all that he does.

5. He is full of integrity. For John, the world is still black and white. He knows his limits and abides them well, taking vigilant care to guard himself and our family against harmful or otherwise divisive influences. He chooses the better part consistently and always has, it seems. I hope that in this thing our children will take cues from his lifelong example of good living.

We started with dinner with the Stratton's

Followed by tasty dessert
Then things started getting a little wild

We went out to see Angels and Demons (and I ate a ton of Swedish fish, as my tongue attests)

Latest Project

2009-05-19T00:08:00.000-07:00

A few years back I lost the dresser that belonged to the above drawers. How it was lost is a tragic tale that I'll spare you.
Having used this dresser all of my life, I couldn't bear the thought of throwing out the drawers, but I also couldn't come up with a way to use them.
Then finally I came upon some great inspiration, and here you have it! I give you my own modular bookcase. Click on the link for a great tutorial.

Weekend in Dallas

2009-05-18T09:53:00.000-07:00

We spent this weekend in Dallas. Even though Memorial Day weekend is next week and we could perhaps have afforded another day, the King Tut Exhibit was closing and Grandpa Bill was in town and the Allred's had time for us- so all of the stars were rightly aligned.
We had such a great time. These pics are from Mama Benac's home site, hence the out-of-place caption. But we thought they were good ones.

Good Job, Daddy

2009-05-15T20:26:00.000-07:00

So i'm putting Lucy to bed tonight (in my littel sisters old room in Dallas,) and I come to the part where I tell her that I am going to leave.

She gets sad and wimpers that I stay for a little bit longer. I have this whole moral dillemma, because I want to go read my book, but I also want to answer my plea. We negociated for a little while, with me telling her it would be ok and her asking me to please stay.

Finally I decide to stay and just lay there with her still for a monent or so. When she realizes that I am going to stay, she says: "Good job, Daddy," as if she was testing me the whole time. I guess I passed that moral test

Mother's Day Vacation

2009-05-14T12:53:00.000-07:00

Ahh. I got a great gift for Mother's Day this year. Time off.
I think I want to make this a tradition.

We got a hotel room in dowtntown Austin, just the girls.
In case there was any question, Austin is still weird. I love that city. Observe both the proverbial and literal back end of the Austin Bike Zoo:

Lonely Pappa with Wonderful Children

2009-05-09T18:42:00.001-07:00

And now for the stream of consciousness with the auto spell check:

Lucy is so funny

Some of the funny things that she said today:

I'm opening it, and It's broken (on her fingernail that was falling off after getting it crushed in the door a few weeks ago

She said some other really funny things. I cant remember them all, but I just love spending time with my kids. It took all day. I mean that literally. After I got back from class, Jackie Carrasco handed over the kids (Thank you very much, Jackie) and It took the rest of the day to go walking with them, feed them, spend time with Rowan when Lucy was asleep, and vice versa.

Rowan is awesome as well. He has so much warmth and joy.

Towards the end of the day, Lucy insisted that her bears and her chairs went with her everywhere. I had to do some serious bargaining with her at dinnertime. We finally ended up with both of her bears flanking her in the little white chairs as she ate fried rice at the table.

As I was putting Lucy down for bed

She had diaper rash. She knew it was going to hurt and so did I. I pleaded with her that we needed to wipe her bottom and that she was going to be ok, even though it was going to hurt. She gave me a brave look and blurted: "Give me my bear!" as she willingly took the temporary plunge into excruciating pain. What a sweetheart. I gave her the bear and had at that diaper rash.

As I was singing to her tonight, I began to sing to her about her mamma. She loved it. We sang about how helpful Mamma was and how she took Lucy to the park and took her to Michael and Benjamin's and how she made us pasta. Lucy asked me to sing it again and again. We miss our Mamma, but are so happy that she is having a much needed respite from her sterling service as a mother.

Lucy has picked up the phrase "go away." I have begun to teach her how to say "May I please have my privacy," although I'm not sure that I want her saying either very much. It's cute to hear her ask so politely for her privacy, but if I am not quick enough in giving her her privacy, she reverts to "go away." She said it tonight when she was holed up in the little space on her big mama jama window sill behind the curtains. She had set up the little white chairs there and when I poked my uninvited head through the curtains I saw that she had laid the bears down on their sides as if they were asleep. After confirming to me that they were asleep, she first abruptly told me to go away and then more politely asked my for her privacy, please.

Oh yeah, a really funny thing that happens now. I have started reading Lucy imaginary books (I am getting a little bored of her book collection). Always, at the end of every book, weather it be about fish, or baby moses, or whatever, I have the main characters go to sleep. I have Lucy say goodnight to the invisible characters on my hands which I am holding up like a book in the darkened room. I figure that it is a good little trick to get Lucy thinking that it really is time for sleep. Well, today and yesterday she has pulled out a trick of her own that I believe is a permanent countermeasure to my wiles.

Lucy opens up a book of her own with her little hands, and says: Oh Hi Baby Moses! Look, He's awake!

Touche, Lucy Lu.

Picnic Frock GIVEAWAY!!!!

2009-05-07T18:06:00.000-07:00

And this one too, from her own blog.
I have no shame here, people. I want to win.
Picnic Frock GIVEAWAY!!!!

The Brass Hussy GUEST GIVEAWAY!!!!

2009-05-07T18:03:00.000-07:00

My SIL turned me on to a blog that I just love. One of her sponsors is this etsy shop. So I'm linking to enter the giveaway.
The Brass Hussy GUEST GIVEAWAY!!!!

Proud to be An American

2009-05-02T22:32:00.000-07:00

So I am the parent who usually puts Lucy to bed. My repertoire of lullabies is severely limited, so Lucy and i have gotten a little creative in how we pass the time in the minutes after we read the books and before I leave.

With Mamie, she can make requests for a wide variety of songs. She knows that I don't know as many, but I try.

Tonight she said: "Sing the eagle song"

hmm... The eagle song. What rhymes with Eagle that she might be talking about...

After a few moments of thinking, I sang softly in her ear:

"And I'm proud to be an American, where at least I know I'm free"

"And I wont forget tho ones who dies, who gave that right for me...

You get the idea. When I was done, I threw in "The Star Spangled Banner" for good measure.

It's never to early to start teaching kids to be patriotic, right?

Lucy's New Room

2009-05-01T18:21:00.000-07:00

Auntie Bethany came for a visit this week and helped me overhaul Lucy's room. Boy did we ever. No one can pull this kind of thing off with style like Bethany can.

Feast your eyes:
She made these gorgeous curtains.

And this hanging mobile as well.

I did do this one myself. Note the little birds. (I thought that was a nice touch, myself.)

Honestly, the pictures don't do it justice. It is FABULOUS. I want his room for my own.

I loved having her here.It was reminiscent of our Provo days together.
Great times. Great, great times.
I am so thankful to have her as family. I just love that girl.
Thank you so much Auntie 'Befamy'. Lucy is already acting more like a lady due to her sweetened digs.

P.S. You know what else rules? Glue guns. duh. I admit I'm a little behind the crafting curve. But seriously people, glue guns. What can't they do?

The Legacy of Quilts

2009-04-30T19:07:00.000-07:00

I never had a quilt. But I always envied the idea of having one of my own. Nothing store bought mind you, one with a story- like "my grandmother made it for me and now I'll pass it down so that something tangible spans the generations."
I guess I do have an afghan my grandmother made. But it wasn't for me, it just happened to come into my hands. In fact, after reading this my mom will probably want it back...
Anyway, a few months back a dream was fulfilled vicariously when Rowan's great grandma Helen made him a quilt- complete with his name and hers. Oh- the blessed woman.
Every child should have one of these.
I don't know if you venture in cyber space, Grandma Helen, but if you do- we want to THANK YOU again a million times over for the beautiful quilt. It means more than you know.

Mod Podge Rules.

2009-04-30T18:36:00.000-07:00

Exhibit A:

a coffee table transformed. Around the edges I used calling cards I collected while living as a missionary in Taiwan. If you enlarge the photo you will see they are scenes from life on the island.

Exhibit B:

revival of $.50 yard sale find, the toy of the century

Oh yes, you know what else rules? Paper Source. Perhaps mod podge wouldn't be such fun without perfect paper to choose from.

The boy deserves his own post for once.

2009-04-22T20:37:00.000-07:00

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Rowan cut his first two teeth yesterday. He is sweeter and brighter than ever. I know they don't all come like this, but he is definitely the kind of kid that keeps families in business.

Catching up

2009-04-22T19:23:00.000-07:00

Here is Lucy with two of her best mates, brothers Michael and Benjamin. She says their names as one, and asks for them constantly. She and Benjamin are only a few days apart.

We made up for doing nothing at all on Lucy's 1st birthday by having a round of parties this year. Thanks to our friends for indulging the last minute lunch party between conference sessions. And special thanks to Mike for climbing high up in the tree for this shot. The kiddos all had a blast in the bounce castle, except for Lucy who has been afraid to get in it from day one. She fears nothing else it seems, but bouncing.

One day last week, while running wild with said mates, Lucy caught the corner of their dining table. This sweet little shiner was the result.

I had spring portraits arranged for the next day.

Needless to say we postponed. Unless you consider this a spring portrait:

(thanks for the dress-up's mom)

We took a trip to Austin last weekend for Easter. Lucy absolutely couldn't be bothered to look for eggs. She ate her weight in robins eggs anyway, every time I caught up with her she had fists and mouthfuls of chocolates.

I keep telling John that's what happens to kids who aren't ever allowed to eat sweets. They just finally go crazy and start hoarding sugar.

Otherwise, we have been enjoying the perfect weather and Lucy's new favorite pastime:

(apparently they climb best with tongues out)

Birthday Girl

2009-03-22T20:29:00.000-07:00

Happy day (on the 19th) to the girl we adore. She is the joy of my life, the laughter that comes to me unexpectedly.

We celebrated beach style. It was so perfect to be with so many doting cousins, aunties, uncles, and grandparents.

Just Beachy

2009-03-21T18:57:00.000-07:00

wow.

We just got home from the best vacation ever.

Conclusively.
And both John and I have been on some good vacations.

Here are some of the top reasons:

1. Lucy + the beach = LOVE

She got up every morning, tore through the house to the sometimes open window in our bedroom and shouted out, "HI BEACH! I'm right here." She wanted to be out there the minute her eyes were open. Nothing compares to seeing her so joyous over life.

2. Family

Along with her beach greeting, Lucy would yell "Cousins! Cousins! I'm right here!", even though she was always the first awake. She adored them- and her vocabulary blossomed as she followed them around doing and saying just what they did.

3. Location

Remote and quiet. Very few people around- and yet there was a colony of dolphins living along our little bay. We literally swam with them and they happily performed all kinds of friendly little shows (seriously within 5 feet). It was amazing.

4. Location

No one wore shoes. We just walked off the porch onto the beach.
Oh, are you hungry?
Just run inside and grab some fruit and then back on the beach.
Sleepy?
Beach.
Sun starved?
Beach.
Want some exercise?
Beach run.
You get the idea.

Our little road warrior on a long drive home:

My Latest Obsession

2009-03-08T15:52:00.000-07:00

The Kepler spacecraft just launched with the ability (and the probability) of finding earth like planets around other stars. So what do we do once we find them?

So my brain was a chugging on a related little problem for my Space Systems Engineering class, and a few sleepless nights and a lot of clicking, typing and thinking this is what comes out:

The gray thing is Ceres, a big shiny ball floating in the asteroid belt.

So here is the thing: Craters on Ceres as huge satellite dishes for antenna feeds orbiting above them.

Think Arecibo, but a bagillion (props Jackie) times bigger, and instead of that little white thing hanging on cables with winches you have a satellite flying above the dish.

It's like DirectTV for Alien Cable TV. Once we find the other planets, then we tune in to their radio, TV, or whatever else they are talking about.

I could seriously cry.

2009-03-06T13:07:00.000-08:00

Behold,

my precious junk store find.

And by junk store I do not mean the trendy antique shop,
I mean the "you-gotta-dig-for-it", dirty, stinky thrift store.

(for $50. yes, just 5 0. Take that, overpriced craigslisters)

There it was, calling silently out for me, "Notice me! I shouldn't be here. This is all a huge mistake! Quick! Do something!"

oh, the joy.

I just HAD to share this moment. By the way, I unloaded and set this baby up all by myself. It couldn't wait for John's might. I simply had to see it's splendor against the blue walls.

Where there is a will...

(also, when John sees it this way himself for the first time, there will be no further need to justify the meager expense.)

Lucy's First Tea Party

2009-03-01T11:30:00.000-08:00

It was the cutest thing in the world to watch Lucy and three of her little girlfriends enjoy a dainty morning tea party. Upon arrival, all of the girls went back to get dressed up properly for the occasion.

It went something like this for us:

(Lucy eagerly puts on the pint-sized apron.)

Stacey: Lucy do you want to put on this skirt, too?
L: No.
S: How about some of these jewels?
L: No.
S: Well what about this boa?
L: No.

So in the end, you see, Lucy looks more like the hired help than like her splendidly accessorized counterparts. It by no means diminished her experience, however. She was as proper and sweet as a princess.

Execution of the Plan

2009-02-27T20:45:00.000-08:00

A close friend from my single days moved (unbeknownst to us both) to Houston for her doctoral program. When I found out she was here, John's workmate, Bryant (far left), colluded with us to surprise her on a double date.
So good to see her. I love the way the church keeps us connected.

I wanna be a singer in a rock 'n' roll band

2009-02-22T21:13:00.000-08:00

M: Did you know I've written a few songs?
J: Really? You never told me that before. Once I wrote a song too, but then when I was finished I realized it was a U2 song.

How could I not post these?

2009-02-20T22:10:00.000-08:00

Even the word "Austin" is cool.

2009-02-19T13:33:00.000-08:00

I heart Austin. There I was born, there I grew up. There I wish to live again someday to grow old and hippie like my family before me.
Too bad you can't launch fireworks there, much less any other thing up into space. *sigh*
Perhaps in Houston we will remain.
Ah well, at least we'll always have an excuse to go to Austin to play. Maybe that way it will always keep it's lofty place in my worldview.
I took the kids up last week to visit the family- Lucy adored her cousin Samuel and bullied her cousin Mary, followed grandma around wherever she went and gave grandpa some serious hugs and kisses. I love living close enough for that.
On the train at Zilker

Lucy's first leaf pile romp

Late night chats with the girls

Valentine's party at the library

Two handsome boys

2009-02-04T20:55:00.000-08:00

I couldn't ask for two cuter,sweeter, more lovable men in my life.

It's Going Around

2009-02-04T19:41:00.000-08:00

We've been sick. Really sick. For a long, long time. For poor Lucy, it's already been over a month now. For about a week she got well, and now it looks like it's back again. It's been all kleenex, hand sanitizer, breathing treatments for the boy, and antibiotics for ear infections around here.
Blah.
Still they are resilient and sweet as ever.

Need more of that one on top? Thought so.

I so cherish him.

My One Track Mind

2008-12-08T20:19:00.000-08:00

So some of you know about my escapades with actionforspace.com

Well, I'm really loving my job here in Houston, and I feel a great deal of passion and commitment to the industry that I am engaged in.

I just got involved with a really cool website called OpenNASA.com, which is a community blog with other people who are the future leaders of this nation's space program.

My maiden post there deals with whether or not the USA will stick it through and really build a permanent moon base. Check it out.

It's a great blessing to have a job that I really care and feel passionate about. I told Mamie the other day that literally the fate of worlds rests in the effort that I am engaged in. If you are like her, you would start at such a bold statement initially, but the business that I am in is truly pushing for eventual expansion of mankind to other worlds, such as the Moon and Mars.

Through all this, I maintain to Mamie and myself that my family is more important than all else, and echoing the words of the prophet David McKay, "No other success can compensate for failure in the home." I believe that. It's written on the bumper sticker on our car (In Chinese.) Mamie is a fantastic supportive wife, and a rarity in today's day and age. God will sustain me in my righteous desires outside of family if I place him and my family above all else and if those desires do not detract from my eternal salvation. I marvel at the joy and fulfillment that Lucy and Rowan bring to my (conceivable to others) sterile life. Graduate classes, church callings, family time, and work are pretty much the lions share of my day. With a computer placed inconveniently in the home and without a TV connection, there isn't much else besides our friends to mix things up. I suppose I should change that for Mamie's sake.

That being said, I want everyone to know how much I care about our nation's space program. It serves to raise our people, race, species, and planet to higher levels of unity and sustainability. It serves to bring direction and energy to people like me, who once had little direction for a career and no lofty goals for mankind. Space Exploration serves to bring wonder, inspiration, and fulfillment to the lowliest of the low "base of the pyramid." Eventually, advances from space exploration lift all of humanity through technological advancement and increased knowledge or our world.

You gotta see this

2008-12-04T11:42:00.000-08:00

My sister-in-law is amazing. Here is an animation she created for Coldplay's video contest. The song is Lost? from Viva la Vida. Watch it and pass on the link to others who might like it. I spent some time this morning watching some of the other entries and I have to say that this is by far the most creative, interesting, and compelling.
I wish some of her creativity could rub off on me.

It doesn't get better than this.

2008-11-17T21:24:00.000-08:00

Or maybe it does. For now, I'm good with being delusional. I do love these two. It's just that two is, indeed, more than one.
In every. single. way.

At The Zoo

2008-11-15T20:34:00.000-08:00

The Benac 4 had a splendid afternoon at the Houston Zoo, where they had a real live Okapi. Lucy, smart as she is, shouted "Zebra!" as we approached it. Mamie and I knew it wasn't a Zebra, but we really had no idea what to tell her it was.

We got to the zoo and it was too cold. We did have a Halloween costume (never used, by the way) in the trunk. So we put it on Lucy. It was warm and totally adorable. Everyone at the zoo thought so. Except for one lady. She looked at Lucy and didn't even smile. Everyone else though was doing double takes and busting up laughing. At the end, when we finally got back to the car where our camera was, we took this video. Lucy wasn't ready to call it a night.

Interesting little Excerpt

2008-11-11T16:17:00.000-08:00

(Bush remarks on his meeting with Obama at the White House)
By CNN's Alexander Mooney

"Bush described the atmosphere in his Oval Office meeting with Obama as relaxed and said he offered the future president advice on the transition process. Bush also said Obama was specifically interested in how his two young daughters would adjust to life in the White House.

"It was interesting to watch him go upstairs," Bush said. "He wanted to see where his little girls were going to sleep. Clearly, this guy is going to bring a sense of family to the White House, and I hope Laura and I did the same thing. But I believe he will, and I know his girls are on his mind and he wants to make sure that first and foremost, he is a good dad. And I think that's going to be an important part of his presidency."

2008-11-04T21:36:00.000-08:00

I feel happy.

Things I love

2008-11-02T18:31:00.000-08:00

We blessed Rowan today at church. I love that both my parents and John's parents came down for the occasion.

I love hearing Lucy say "Baby Rowan." She adores him, although intensely jealous that he nurses.
I love having children (plural).
I love that my children are exactly who they are.

I love Lucy in this costume.

And this one.

I love having grandparents who are so involved and in love with our babies. Lucy adores her grandpa's.

In case you missed it

2008-10-29T18:39:00.000-07:00

It's worth your time, especially you last few Undecided's (you know who you are...).

A few more

2008-10-26T18:34:00.000-07:00

Looking back more thoroughly, I realized I just had to post a few more.

Here we are with our heroic Dr. Johnson, deliverer of large babies. Although admittedly, she got off way easy with this one. I think she was there for about 15 minutes total.

Lucy at Trunk or Treat. As you can see, she was a UT cheerleader.

Presenting...

2008-10-26T18:05:00.000-07:00

...the slightly less-puffy face of the new boy we all adore, featuring our favorite Lucy and Grandparents Jamison. Did we really ever live before he came to be with us? He fits us so perfectly.

(Quasi) Live Blogging from the Center for New Life at Christus Saint John's

2008-10-21T19:35:00.000-07:00

OK. Time for a little live blogging, cached through my journal:

10/21/2008

8:08 AM

I'm in the hospital. Mamie is at the beginning of a so-far low-key labor. Rod came to our house at 6:30 AM from work. Mamie is having contractions that come in regular 4-minute intervals sometimes, but sometimes she misses one. I called my boss at 7:30 to tell him that I was here at the hospital. We haven’t called Mamie's mom yet. Barbara Jamison is teaching at a stake Relief Society Event tonight or tomorrow in Austin. She will probably come if we call, but she will feel very stressed about missing it. Mamie is on the phone with her right now.

Rod was surprised at how nonchalant Mamie and I were this morning.

8:45

The Doctor, Anitra Johnson, just came in. Mamie's body has relaxed a bit and we are faced with the hazy future of either going home, getting Potosin to induce, or maybe things will continue naturally. I said a prayer with Mamie that the baby would come soon. That could either mean that it happens naturally or that we take matters into our own hands.

9:05

Dr. Johnson has left the room. We gave her the go ahead to use Pitosin to speed up the labor. Our rationale is this: the pregnancy is obviously far enough along because Mamie has been having contractions since 1 AM. We could wait here for a really long time, or go home and come back later, or induce now. We don’t think that it would be bad for Rowan to come now because both Mamie and Rowan (We feel) are pretty much ready to go. On the other hand, waiting here all day or going home and coming back later seems like an unnecessary hassle that wouldn’t do any good. So we are getting Pitosin.

9:48

Pitosin IV is in. I asked Jan, our nurse,"Does Pitosin make people cranky?"

Stacy called and left a message about playgroup. I left a message on her machine and basically said that we were having a baby and that she'd have to figure it out.

10:04

They are drawing a third vial of blood. Now a 4th vial. We are talking with the nurse about how much blood it is. Now a 5th or 6th. That’s too much blood!

10:13

Mamie is talking to her mom. I just got more cereal from the courtesy fridge.

10:33 Barbara Jamison isn’t coming down for several days because of the visiting reaching event conflict. I'm trying to get a hold of my mom to get her down here.

1:42

Nothing. TV. IV. Books. Boredom. Mamie still hasn’t had the baby. I went home and got some food and books. Her contractions are stronger and more frequent than they used to be.

2:00

Mamie is dilated to a 7. Her contractions are frequent. We called in the nurse to measure her.

2:06

"I'm starting to feel the urge to push"... The nurse rushes out to call the doctor. Mamie lies on her side on the bed, breathing heavily, eyes closed, and brow furrowed. A machine begins to chime. One of her biological measures must have changed. Mamie begins to blow out through pursed lips rather than breathe through her nose. Rowan's heart rate is 134. 3 nurses abruptly come into the room, pushing carts and tables. A big light swings out of the ceiling that I didn’t even know was there. Two nurses I have never seen talk to each other in the corner. Nurse Jan moves the "Dentist Light" into position. Mystery Nurse 1 says, "You are set for your baby," as she leaves the room. Mamie lies silently on the bed. The room has transformed in a matter of seconds, all since I started writing. I think that the doctor will be here on time. I hope so, anyway. Jan turns off the beeping and types at the computer; Mamie blows out through pursed lips. Jan turns up the volume for Rowan’s heartbeat, sensed through the fetal monitor strapped to Mamie's belly. Rowan's heart rate is 146. I feel really happy that Rowan is about to be born. The baby table in the corner is making a hissing sound because the two mystery nurses changed something with it. I just snapped a minute of video to record the scene.

Jan fiddles with the IV and computer. Mamie opens her eyes for a few seconds, and then closes them.

2:23

I got back from the bathroom as Jan walks out and another mystery nurse works next to the baby scale and bed. Now Jan’s Back. "All we have to do is turn you over and we would be done,” she says.

Dr Anitra Johnson bursts through the door, panting because she ran. Mamie sits up. She’s about to have the baby. I’m putting down this pen!

2: 32 Rowan is born.

Bam. There you have it. The miracle of birth, and then there were 4 John Wilson Benacs. And also more pictures:

Early Voting Starts Today

2008-10-20T07:41:00.000-07:00

That is all for now. No baby to report yet.

Click here to find an early voting station nearest you. For those in my area, the Freeman library is open from 8 - 4:30.
I am so happy to report that lines are long and there has yet to be a lull (according to one volunteer). It still only took about 10 or 15 minutes. And anyway, this is one of those things that I am grateful to wait for; grateful so many people are out exercising their rights.

One of my favorite bumper stickers?

"Ignore your rights and they'll go away."

Please go vote.